Bite Me
by dark insanity 13
Summary: Gilbert realizes the consequences of not properly preparing for short hikes. Rated T for Prussia's mouth.


Gilbert scowled irritably.

Matthew smirked proudly.

The two of them sat quietly in Matthew's living room, no sound coming between them. The ex-nation glared at his younger friend, who merely replied with a knowing smile. Gilbert's eyebrow suddenly twitched, his hand following soon after. He halted the reflex in time, but his willpower was slowly draining. The grin on Matthew's face got a little bigger.

"I told-"

"Shut up Matt."

Gilbert growling didn't at all cause the satisfied smirk to falter. Silence stretched once more. The albino started fidgeting.

"VERDAMMT I GIVE UP!" he eventually burst out. His hands shot to different spots on his person and he started scratching feverishly. "I fucking hate mosquito bites! Not awesome!"

Matthew cackled.

"See, I warned you to wear bug repellent! But did you listen? No~ you insisted that 'you're too awesome for bug bites'!" he jeered. "And now you have...how many?"

"Fuck if I know!" Prussia snapped, hands still jerking around as he tried to get relieve the itching. Unfortunately, it seemed as soon as he stopped scratching one spot and moved onto another, the spot would start screaming to be scratched again. "Why the hell were they so attracted to me anyway? You didn't wear any bug stuff either! And no one else on the freaking trail was swatting the damn things every two seconds!"

"I dunno...maybe they got a taste of your awesomeness and found it better than anyone else's?"

"Piss off."

"I'm kidding!" Canada insisted while chuckling, raising his hands as if to calm his friend. "Well, sort of. Sometimes mosquitoes are just more attracted to certain people than others."

"Oh really?" Gilbert grumbled dryly. He was scratching at a less frantic pace now, but continued on.

"I'm not lying! Just ask Arthur or Francis! Arthur occasionally has a swarm chasing him, while Francis and I are usually just fine. There was also this one time I saw a couple of red-headed kids having the same problem as you while their parents were just fine. I've heard it has something to do with blood type or whatever. You should stop scratching at those, by the way; it only makes it worse."

The elder nation seemed amused at the thought of England running around like a headless chicken trying to get away from a cloud of tiny bloodsuckers, but he frowned at the suggestion to stop scratching.

"I can't!" he whined. "They won't stop itching! And they're everywhere, so it's not like I can ignore them!"

Sighing and rolling his eyes with an exasperated smile, Matthew stood and disappeared into the hallway.

"C'mon, I've got something that'll help with that. Just because I didn't get bitten this time doesn't mean I haven't had to deal with mosquito bites before."

"Oh this better work, because I'm about ready to start stabbing myself in order to make it stop!" snorted Gilbert, standing to follow, hands twitching to scratch again. "Hey, if I snap and kill the two of us because I couldn't take the itching anymore and needed someone to take it out on, don't blame me okay?"

All Prussia got in response was a laugh.

A/N: This was inspired by a few days ago when a mosquito got into the house, and apparently took a great liking to me since it bit me _seven times_ within the span of half-an-hour, while my dad – who was sitting on the other end of the couch – was left untouched (and then I got two more two days later by a different mosquito...still indoors). Canada mentioning the red-head kids is also a reference to when my family went for a small trek in a forest in P.E.I. last summer; even after putting on bug spray, mosquitoes continued to attack my brother and I, to the point they even started biting us through our clothing. Our parents had no problems at all, and had to walk behind us to swat away the damn buggers.

So I tried looking up whether or not mosquitoes are more attracted to red-heads or something, but apparently it has more to do with blood type or what you've been eating; even then, scientists aren't entirely positive on what exactly causes mosquitoes to be more likely to bite certain people than others. Regardless, I can see Gilbert being the type of person to not bother with bug repellent (or sunscreen) at all. And unfortunately for him, I love to poke fun at and torture the characters I like, and Mattie had his turn in my last fic. To me he's also the type of person to complain and go insane from the evil that are mosquito bites, so it made sense to use him.

Anyway, I like these two, whether as good friends or in a romantic relationship, but I'm not really into writing guy-on-guy romance, so most fics you guys might be seeing from me in the future involving these guys will either be platonic/bromantic or Prussia/fem!Canada (because it's cute).


End file.
